Lettuce Be Healthy

Anyone who knows me, knows I don't like my vegetables. So when I begrudgingly chose to eat a salad for lunch today, you know I must be on one extreme health kick. I prefer salads with more protein than ruffage. I've found only two types of deli-prepared salads I'm willing to eat entirely on their own: a Cobb salad, which has poultry, bacon, bleu cheese, and a hard boiled egg; and a Chef's salad, containing turkey, ham, cheese, and similarly, a hard boiled egg. Today, I find a $6 Chef salad at my local deli.Notice the double exclamation points on the label - "CHEF SALAD!!" So exciting, it It has to be good!! It has the essential Boar's Head brand ham, turkey, cheese, and obligatory hard boiled egg. All for $5.95! Yum. (Sort of.) So back at my desk, I'm shoving salad dressing drenched foliage, with bits of brand name cold cuts, into my maw, and trying to convince myself that I'm enjoying this. When I get to the egg, I see this along the shiny, white surface:That little black dot, is a small, deceased, once flying insect. This is not totally unexpected, and I'm thankful that my little lunch date was easily spotted on the egg and not anywhere less conspicuous (and I'm safely assuming he has no local friends in my salad). Although stuffed from the various leaves I've already consumed, I was determined not to let a mere insect halt my progress. I had fun grossing out my co-workers with my little discovery, but was eventually forced to pick around the salad and finish my lunch, or pass out from hunger. I sacrificed my hard boiled egg, but one must make sacrifices if they are to be an emblem of good health as I am!

I ended the day with a slice of lemon iced pound cake to make up for my healthy lunch.